Unsettling

UPDATE: This page has been adjusted in 2020! You can still see the old version HERE 😉

 

Sometimes I wonder if this comic will even be understandable. No, I don’t mean that particular page, I mean as a whole. Some of you probably know that I have script for first volume done, but it’s a book and I am just picking bits and pieces from it. And damn, it’s only one page a week, to make it move forward at least a little bit I need to cut out a lot of dialogues and narration. I really hope you won’t get lost in the middle of this thing cause I am starting to have doubts myself.

I said last week that I’ll be visiting Comiket in Chiba – I’ve been had, I couldn’t get the ticket, I should have taken care of it sooner… Well, I’ll be smarter next time. And cherry trees are already blooming here, if you are okay with crappy photos you can see them here: http://ni-japan.tumblr.com/

And last thing, obvious, but still important: new month is starting soon! Voting will be crucial! I am counting on you \(-ㅂ-)/ ♥ ♥ ♥

banner-slim

17 comments on “Unsettling”

  1. pvixdestiny Reply

    I’d honstly like to see some sort of journal that can fill in what’s missing. But that sounds like it’d be a lot of work, on top of drawing the page, since it’d only make sense if it was written from one of the characters’ perspectives (not necessarily those we’ve seen so far).

    Maybe you could find a cowriter IRL to transcode some of the book content into a canon journal to fill in the missing content.

    Personally, I’d have a hard time giving someone even an ounce of creative independence when it comes to my characters, but idk. If you based Ada or Robert on an actual person you know, why don’t you have them write it… lol.

    • NotImportant Reply

      Main problem is that English is not my native language and while translating simple dialogues seems easy enough I have no confidence to make something readable from the narration and everything else. Hopefully things will slow down a little bit after prologue is over (at least we won’t jump from one place to another so quickly) and I will add some additional explanations. Journal, at least partial, could be an interesting addition… Maybe I could squeeze 1 comic page + 1 journal note per week? I will think about it, thanks for the idea!

      • Christian Reply

        If the problem is that your native language isn’t English, perhaps you could find a friend or fan who is willing to help editing the dialogue so that it’s more easily understood in English. I personally have some writing skills, being a writer myself.

        Alternatively, the best way to show explanations or narration could be through the backgrounds or cut away panels themselves, I’m not really an artist, but I do know how difficult it can be to explain background information subtly, without throwing it in the face of the reader.

        • NotImportant Reply

          Being subtle enough is a smaller problem than being boring – with only one page a week I simply cannot afford to slow down the action and explain all the details. Additional diary, filled with info about the world they live in would be an elegant solution. I’ll probably do my best, publish it and then fix everything my keen readers find amiss. After all I am doing this for fun, maybe, just maybe, my grammar errors will be forgiven.

          And a writer! I am so jealous..!

          • Christian

            The hardest part about writing is actually getting it down on paper. Which is why I can applaud your ability to tell a story, and have it be as enthralling as it is this quickly. Which all the more makes me want to help in some way, to see this flourish and grow to its full potential.

      • pvixdestiny Reply

        Your English is flawless as far as I can tell.

        Anyway, if you just need someone to check the wording, I can do that. I’ve been cowriting a screenplay with a sibling for the last year, and a lot of that process (for me) has been revising narrative description and dialogue — making sure everything flows correctly.

        Although, yes, I do have an ulterior motive, being a fan and all.

        • NotImportant Reply

          Flawless as it may be it’s still too simple, at least from my perspective. But what am I even worried about… I am not aiming to write a bestseller here, I’ll probably just do what I can and if anything goes wrong I’ll count on my dear readers to point out the errors. Thanks for the offer to help out and for the encouragement!

  2. xthorgoldx Reply

    Did Ada lose her shirt in between the 2nd and 3rd frames? If so, that’s just teasing.

      • xthorgoldx Reply

        …I just requested fanservice, didn’t I.

        xthorgoldx waited. The LCD in front of him blinked and flickered out of the night. There was fanservice on the net. He didn’t see it, but had expected it now for years. His warnings to Cernel Rogers were not listened to and now it was too late. Far too late for now, anyway.
        xthorgoldx was an interneter for fourteen years. When he was young he watched the image boards and he said to dad “I want to be on the internet daddy.”
        Dad said “No! You will BE KILL BY FANSERVICE.”
        There was a time when he believed him. Then as he got oldered he stopped. But now in the internet forum of the webcomics he knew there were fanservice.
        “This is Joson” the radio crackered. “You will block the fanservice!”
        So xthorgoldx gotted his 18+ stick and blew up the firewall.
        “HE IS GOING TO CENSOR US” said the fanservice “I will seduce him” said the cyberfanservice and he fired the lewd doujins. xthorgoldx censored at him and tried to blew him up. But then the network crashed and they were trapped and not able to kill.
        “No! I must kill the fanservice!” he shouted. The radio said “No, xthorgoldx, you are the fanservice”
        And then xthorgoldx was a male model

        I get bored way too easily.

  3. mjkj Reply

    I wonder what they will dream about this night – and when the owners of the tent show up and throw them out… ^_^

  4. N8 Reply

    Okay, so I’m commenting late, but if you’re just going to cut pages anyway they’re not really helping you with the whole “I’ve written it all in advance, so you don’t have to worry about me getting sick” right? Pages never posted aren’t going to help your buffer, so why not just put multiple pages out in an update if you’d have skipped them otherwise?

    • NotImportant Reply

      No, it’s not like that… I’ve got this really old manuscript for a BOOK. Not a comic, a BOOK. This doesn’t really help me out apart from the fact that I have the story planned. And some scenes look nice in the book but would be utterly boring in the comic so I need to rework things, add and remove stuff, I think that’s pretty natural. Under this page I’ve just stated that it makes me a bit anxious as well, since I might break the original story accidentally removing some important details.
      So I don’t really have any skipped pages. Just text, in Polish on top of that. And there is that 4-5 pages buffer I am keeping in case I get sick or something, I guess that’s noting unusual and I got that idea from other comic artists.
      Sorry if I said something confusing!

      • N8 Reply

        Oh, okay then. I misunderstood. Sorry. Well, good luck! I’m liking the comic so far (the dongers in the alt text are a nice touch, btw.)

  5. antrik Reply

    I think this page might be the first time it becomes kinda clear that these two are not actually in a romantic relationship?… I’m surprised nobody commented on it back then…

    On a pretty much entirely unrelated note, I think in that last panel, Ada might be looking her most irresistible ever 🙂

    • antrik Reply

      Still love that panel… I guess I should count it as a plus that you haven’t redrawn this one?… 😉

Leave a Reply to xthorgoldx Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Facebook

Become a Facebook fan! Read the news, see sketches and notes about future pages! Join the community and share comics with your friends! Spread the love and madness!

Read More

Japan photo blog

If you are curious about my travels (well, those to Japan at least) check out my photo blog on Tumblr! Plenty of amateurish, inspirational pictures from multiple trips.

Read More

Hakeme

Digital painting tutorials by NotImportant. Completely free and for everyone who wish to learn - basic drawing tutorials, advanced digital paintings, videos, steps and tips!

Read More