Little regrets

I wonder if any of you can relate to Filip. Probably not many. Usually, life is simpler than this.

Next page: (where Stefen speaks his mind)
Next next page: (when weird shit starts happening)

How was your week? Mine was short since we had Monday off because of the Mountain Day. Thank you, Japan, for having so many fantastic national holidays. We didn’t go to the mountains since cases have been growing in Tokyo. Well, most of you probably already at least know someone who has been infected… Please stay well guys and take care of yourselves and your loved ones.

As for me, I’ve been spending my time on Historia and have finally finished sketching out the assets for the second chapter. I was bummed out that I can’t share any of this so we’re thinking of setting up a Patreon for the team, just for the purpose of putting our progress there and sharing some tiny spoilers we’ve set up Patreon for Historia! and I already shared some art update there (well, hopefully not so spoilery spoilers, since the story is the most important part and we’re planning to pretty much share progress on art and music, maybe throw in some RenPy tutorials for those who want to build their own game).

So yeah, I’m excited! Time to roll up my sleeves and get to some real drawing!

Apart from that, I’ve been posting some sketches on Patreon (for all to see) from the sketch requests that you guys gave me! I posted 3 and I have 2 more coming. I know I said I might try streaming but… damn, I just can’t draw with someone watching my hands. My stupid low self-esteem is just paralyzing my hand and I just don’t feel comfortable doing that. I can record myself making some of those doodles if you guys like? But I’m not sure if that’s interesting to anyone.

Anyhow, I’ll be updating the newest sketch on the bottom of the under-page note, like this:

24 comments on “Little regrets”

    • NotImportant Reply

      My bad. I fell into the trap of assuming that everyone else must have had it easier. Silly me.

  1. Refugnic Reply

    Filip falls to his own guilt,
    his foolishness, the cage he built.
    Remorse and anger in the night,
    ‘Why’d I sign up now for this fight?’

    Was it for fun, was it for glory?
    I’m not the hero of this story.
    I’m not blessed, not even kind.
    Tell me, why I’d be so blind?

    Now here I sit, my head hung low,
    go ahead now, deal your blow.
    Deal out the hurt, the shouts, the blame,
    as I sit here, lost in shame.

    Yes, sure, back then, I did believe,
    the great things I’d yet achieve.
    But now that things are said and done,
    I can’t believe she’s truly gone.

    And as I waste the night away,
    a foolish lamb who’s gone astray.
    You come and look at my defiance.
    disturb the quiet, the sound of silence.

  2. Refugnic Reply

    We may not have the exact same kind of problem Filip is having here, but we all have our burdens to carry.

    For example my writing.
    In order to get anything done, I must chip away time wherever I can.
    I write mostly during my lunchbreaks (my company graciously allows me to do so) and on the weekends, when everyone is away.

    As of right now, I have just about the entire weekend for myself, because my wife and my son went to visit my parents in law.
    I’ve got a few photos about how they’re having fun at a nearby lake, splashing around and stuff.
    As for why I’m writing this commentary instead of being there with them…well, as I said, we all have our burdens to carry.

    Mine entails, that my mother in law doesn’t particularly like me or anything I’m doing.
    So yeah…lots of time to write this weekend…

    As such, I’ll agree with William: Life should be simple…but it just about never is.
    There’s always a catch…a compromise to be made.

  3. JW Reply

    I’m glad Filip realizes he’s an asshole.
    Maybe he could write all his reasoning down, if he can’t bear to say it in person.

  4. Rateus Camp dweller Reply

    On the plus side Filip you’ll have made some people long term delighted (albeit short term guilty).

    • David Reply

      If the survival of remaining humans is at stake and the “spell” may be only way to stop the demons at some point, then a person might think it is worth it.

      It is a world where most are already dead, demons are nearly impossible to stop by conventional means, and survival of group can come down to one person able to stop the demons from getting through to slaughter group.

  5. Regis Earsquake Reply

    I remember mountain day, when I studied abroad in japan for a few months. I went to the lokal mountain. It looked like half the city got the same idea, even though it was super hot and humid that day. I still remember some girls that arrived a few minutes after me at the top, that wore light wool sweaters. They looked like they were about to die of heat. Clothing is one thing I never figured out over there.

    • NotImportant Reply

      That’s right!!! We did mountain day in the mountains once too, every year after that we just went to the ocean instead lol
      And clothes are tricky here but I also were long sleeves during summer. Yes, it’s crazy hot, but at least my skin doesn’t hate me… Sunscreen can only do so much.

      • Regis Earsquake Reply

        I guess sun explains it to a degree, but it was cloudy, though. It took me some time to get used to it being super hot, humid and cloudy at the same time.

  6. Alex Reply

    Yeah, I can’t relate to Filip either, but it would be boring if characters didn’t mess up real bad. If I had been in his shoes and Nina had told be that she didn’t believe in me, I would’ve said something like
    “I want to try anyway, because we need to maximize our chances of survival. Also I don’t want to die a horribly painful death caused by an ugly monster. I want some means of fighting back. You don’t want me to die either, right?”

    • Alex Reply

      Also I would’ve talked to others about the problem. I remember Nina poking that older guy for info, because she didn’t know what was going on.

    • Davod Reply

      I don’t think it is too hard to understand… it is a “needs of the many verses needs of the few” problem. “Magic” might mean difference between survival and everyone getting killed by demons, you never know when you will be the crucial last defense line when others are unable to be.

      He doesn’t think he can reason with his girlfriend, she won’t believe in his chance to “help with magic” and he thinks he is too weak willed to be able to get his way if he tries to talk to her.

      • Alex Reply

        While I did understand all of the reasoning already, I don’t believe that his reasoning was correct, so I still can’t relate to Filip, because I don’t see why it would be more difficult to talk to Nina than to break up with her without saying anything. I would’ve talked to Stefen about it first, maybe others, too. Communication is important.

        And to be honest: If you’re too weak to face Nina, then you’re definitely too weak to face demons as well.

        • JW Reply

          The demons aren’t half as sexy, though. (At least none of the ones we’ve seen yet.) So I can see why he fears he might lose his resolve if he had to face her head on.
          Being too weak to face Nina, or too weak to face demons are different things. They require different kinds of courage. For some risking their lives is easier than risking their feelings.

          • Alex

            I don’t care how different the kinds of courage are, if you run away from facing a sexy woman you’re supposed to have bonded with I don’t trust you with fighting super deadly demons, not least because your woman-issues will make you emotionally unstable.
            Also does Filip look like he can risk his life at all? I don’t think so. I’m pretty much on Stefen’s side here, if you look at the next page. “Kids these days” and all that.

          • JW

            I don’t care how different the kinds of courage are

            Well, that’s fine. I mean, this is the internet. I know better than to expect anyone to listen to arguments.

            Also does Filip look like he can risk his life at all?

            At the moment? Definitely. If there were still any trains running, he looks like he might throw himself in front of one. Easier than facing Nina.
            I doubt he’d be thinking about his Nina-troubles when facing a demon though. Which is why I think they’re completely irrelevant to his usefulness on the battlefield.
            But who cares what I think.

  7. bitflipper Camp dweller Reply

    Filip, hopefully Stefan will give you this advice, himself: there is *no* way to break up with a woman that won’t leave you feeling like an ass. Heck, even if she’s the one breaking up with you, you will still feel like an ass. It’s probably something to do with evolution, or something like that. The fact of the matter, though, is: we were never meant to go through life single, and, so, when we try to do so, life hits back by making us feel all ass-like. This is because, on the whole, life is stupid; it cannot figure out if it’s in a bad situation, or what it wants for the future, or when it’s heading down a dead end. *We* can, though. So, there will come times when what you want seems to go against what life wants. And those are the times life will make us miserable.

    But, take heart. Not only is life stupid, it also has a fairly short attention span. You will only feel like an ass for a little while, comparatively speaking. You will eventually feel better, and, who knows? Maybe life will even prove that you made the right choice!

  8. mathiau Reply

    If you need a compromise so your girlfriend don’t ask you for sex you’re in a seriously unhealthy relationship, Filip did it wrong but he was right to leave Nina

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